In the Bible it says when one forgives it should be seventy times seven (Matthew 18:22)...its actually no limits, forgive so that you will be forgiven. It's freedom from guilt, anxiety, anger, fear and uncertainties.
Forgive in your heart so as the Lord has forgiven you with all your debts when He offered freely His life as a ransom for your sins. As He have forgiven you blamelessly, so who are you not to forgive?
I'm broken and I'm hurt maybe somehow the Lord intended this to happen to purify me to show me how imperfect the world is, our community is and am I ready to embrace the kind of life that its gonna be?
If we want mercy shown to us we must be ready to forgive others as God has forgiven us. Do you hold any grudge or resentment towards anyone?
"Lord Jesus, you have been kind and forgiving towards me. May I be merciful as you are merciful. Free me from all bitterness and resentment that I may truly forgive from the heart those who have caused me injury or grief."
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
"If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault"
Today's Gospel hit me..big time as in. After that spiteful experience I have last Monday, I felt this hurt so much and it pierced my heart. Up until this morning I was actually trying to see where God is during those moments and what the Lord is telling me about such experience and so this message from Him very clearly and yet very strong:
"One is wounded and your hurt too, but your silence will not help...set aside your own injury but do not neglect your sister's wound."
When I got this message I said who is wounded and who is hurt, my pride says your wounded and very much hurt, she should feel that, after all she's much closer to the Father than me, she prayed a lot more than me and God knows how many times He used her spoke of His message, she should have sense it by now how hurt I am.
But I ask the Holy Spirit to grant me the grace to be more forgiving and help me put down my pride for awhile and say to the person who hurt you most to finally have a one to one talk and to settle things and probably iron out differences and move on.
I did actually and I felt so liberating even that moment that we are not yet decided when and where its gonna be then. I'd like to quote below this meditation I chance upon today on my scriptural reading:
Saint Augustine of Hippo comments on Jesus' instruction:
If someone has done you injury and you have suffered, what should be done? You have heard the answer already in today’s scripture: “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone.” If you fail to do so, you are worse than he is. He has done someone harm, and by doing harm he has stricken himself with a grievous wound. Will you then completely disregard your brother’s wound? Will you simply watch him stumble and fall down? Will you disregard his predicament? If so, you are worse in your silence than he in his abuse. Therefore, when any one sins against us, let us take great care, but not merely for ourselves. For it is a glorious thing to forget injuries. Just set aside your own injury, but do not neglect your brother’s wound. Therefore “go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone,” intent upon his amendment but sparing his sense of shame. For it might happen that through defensiveness he will begin to justify his sin, and so you will have inadvertently nudged him still closer toward the very behavior you desire to amend. Therefore “tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother,” because he might have been lost, had you not spoken with him. [Sermon 82.7]
Hope the damaged relationship I feel now will help finally be restored back again through the help of the Holy Spirit. And through its power teach me to be more humble, forgiving and to trust again.
Thank you Lord for helping me out, I really do plan to brood over this grievances and to kept my silence in years and let You do the job, bahala na. I'm still in pain please do help me.
"One is wounded and your hurt too, but your silence will not help...set aside your own injury but do not neglect your sister's wound."
When I got this message I said who is wounded and who is hurt, my pride says your wounded and very much hurt, she should feel that, after all she's much closer to the Father than me, she prayed a lot more than me and God knows how many times He used her spoke of His message, she should have sense it by now how hurt I am.
But I ask the Holy Spirit to grant me the grace to be more forgiving and help me put down my pride for awhile and say to the person who hurt you most to finally have a one to one talk and to settle things and probably iron out differences and move on.
I did actually and I felt so liberating even that moment that we are not yet decided when and where its gonna be then. I'd like to quote below this meditation I chance upon today on my scriptural reading:
Saint Augustine of Hippo comments on Jesus' instruction:
If someone has done you injury and you have suffered, what should be done? You have heard the answer already in today’s scripture: “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone.” If you fail to do so, you are worse than he is. He has done someone harm, and by doing harm he has stricken himself with a grievous wound. Will you then completely disregard your brother’s wound? Will you simply watch him stumble and fall down? Will you disregard his predicament? If so, you are worse in your silence than he in his abuse. Therefore, when any one sins against us, let us take great care, but not merely for ourselves. For it is a glorious thing to forget injuries. Just set aside your own injury, but do not neglect your brother’s wound. Therefore “go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone,” intent upon his amendment but sparing his sense of shame. For it might happen that through defensiveness he will begin to justify his sin, and so you will have inadvertently nudged him still closer toward the very behavior you desire to amend. Therefore “tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother,” because he might have been lost, had you not spoken with him. [Sermon 82.7]
Hope the damaged relationship I feel now will help finally be restored back again through the help of the Holy Spirit. And through its power teach me to be more humble, forgiving and to trust again.
Thank you Lord for helping me out, I really do plan to brood over this grievances and to kept my silence in years and let You do the job, bahala na. I'm still in pain please do help me.
Monday, August 11, 2008
If Words Can Kill
If words can kill, I already died now, but it doesn't have to mean that because its true that's why I'm a bit affected about those words thrown at me...Well, come to think of it, the words came from somebody I look up to. She's our Pastoral Leader in the community whom we have love for almost 6 years of our lives. It's the community that showed us even more how good God is and we are now actually leaving it now and for good.
Actually it wasn't her fault that we are leaving, she just actually help us to decide quickly about it. As you can see, before the day of this community's anniversary, we were thinking of searching for another community much nearer to our place and my husband already somehow informed his PL about it.
Then came this anniversary celebration, this particular gestures from members of the community that affected us so much, actually my husband did. It was such a petty gestures but enough for us to finally think of leaving the community gradually.
On the way home when my husband told me about it, I actually do not have any feeling or even any plans about leaving, I don't mind those sacrifices we made being always around whenever the community meets...distance is not an issue. There were far more issues even before that would be very apt to decide and leave community for good, but we did not do it, yet why only now?
Practical reasons, distance, tiredness, means, resources, energies, life-giving or meaning, probably are some of the possible reasons why we are on the verge of leaving this community, no more no less. It did not dawn on me, I wanted to grow old in the community and see my children grow here, but my husband sees it differently. Maybe he sees something beyond my eyes or my feelings can reach, that LNP is not for us and that's all and that's it.
But maybe the Lord did allow this to happen to finally help me see things clearly and probably help us decide finally through this minute issue to the point that I felt so hurt, so disappointed and so devastated.
Words do can kill, and I fond to say words say things to someone else even if its too personal, even out of tactlessness I would utter words, meaningful at times and senseless at times. But it did kill me, why, I did not know that those words I thrown out maybe carelessly or probably out of my (no as I realized wrong thing to do) need and desire to be obedient to the kind of life this community has thought me, we're thrown at me and was used against my favor much worse judged me and my husband so cruelly, for us to think that it was all along non-sense, meaningless and useless as to what we did in the community even before. We were just a sham, hypocrite and were so untrue and simply put we don't have to be in that community.
I was really hurt and I really decided not to go back there anymore, I have died because I was killed by words- words that I actually have spoken into. I'm wounded and I'm hurt.
Actually it wasn't her fault that we are leaving, she just actually help us to decide quickly about it. As you can see, before the day of this community's anniversary, we were thinking of searching for another community much nearer to our place and my husband already somehow informed his PL about it.
Then came this anniversary celebration, this particular gestures from members of the community that affected us so much, actually my husband did. It was such a petty gestures but enough for us to finally think of leaving the community gradually.
On the way home when my husband told me about it, I actually do not have any feeling or even any plans about leaving, I don't mind those sacrifices we made being always around whenever the community meets...distance is not an issue. There were far more issues even before that would be very apt to decide and leave community for good, but we did not do it, yet why only now?
Practical reasons, distance, tiredness, means, resources, energies, life-giving or meaning, probably are some of the possible reasons why we are on the verge of leaving this community, no more no less. It did not dawn on me, I wanted to grow old in the community and see my children grow here, but my husband sees it differently. Maybe he sees something beyond my eyes or my feelings can reach, that LNP is not for us and that's all and that's it.
But maybe the Lord did allow this to happen to finally help me see things clearly and probably help us decide finally through this minute issue to the point that I felt so hurt, so disappointed and so devastated.
Words do can kill, and I fond to say words say things to someone else even if its too personal, even out of tactlessness I would utter words, meaningful at times and senseless at times. But it did kill me, why, I did not know that those words I thrown out maybe carelessly or probably out of my (no as I realized wrong thing to do) need and desire to be obedient to the kind of life this community has thought me, we're thrown at me and was used against my favor much worse judged me and my husband so cruelly, for us to think that it was all along non-sense, meaningless and useless as to what we did in the community even before. We were just a sham, hypocrite and were so untrue and simply put we don't have to be in that community.
I was really hurt and I really decided not to go back there anymore, I have died because I was killed by words- words that I actually have spoken into. I'm wounded and I'm hurt.
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